Me: (Wearing a new maternity shirt.) Check out my fabulous cleavage in this shirt! (Because if you are going to have a Buddah-like belly, you might as well accentuate the positives, right?)
Todd: Oh. Yes. Very nice.
Me. You do realize that me having to point out my fabulous cleavage gets you in way more trouble than the times you have no idea that I've cut my hair, right?
(In fairness, once I didn't notice that he'd vacuumed out the car. Nine years ago. It took me a week to realize it was cleaner. He was a little offended, but has since probably forgotten about it, because he's good like that. I've tried to pay attention since then, mostly because I am ALL for rewarding that type of behavior!)