Thursday, March 10, 2016

Twoo Wuv





Todd and I have been married for a little over 17 years now, and we've known one another in varying degrees for the better part of 34 years. We've reached an age where a lot of our friends have married, had kids, and are beginning to divorce. Or in some cases, have already divorced and are remarrying.

I can't say that will never happen to us. Mostly because I've learned to avoid definitive statements like that. I've eaten my words far too many times after uttering "I'll never...". That being said, I genuinely like Todd. He is such a good man and I'm always so amazed at his generosity of spirit. 

The other day, I asked if I could borrow his iPod for the day so I could go running. (Technically, I own an iPod, too, but mine is big and clunky and no fun to run with. His is delightfully small AND has my running mix loaded on to it.) But he and the kids have been listening to the musical "Hamilton" on the way to school each morning. When I remembered that, I waved him off with the kids and told him that I would just run later that night when he got home or run without it during the day. No problem. 

Todd is so busy at work with meetings that we often have zero interactions throughout the day. So he leaves the house at 7:20 am, and I don't see him again until 7 pm. (You can take the businessman out of New York...) However, 20 minutes after leaving the house that morning, he pulled back in the driveway. I assumed he'd forgotten something, so I opened the front door to find him coming up the walk with his iPod, as he hurried back to his car to get to work after handing me said iPod he said, "We've listened for the morning, now you can use it to go running today!"

Such a simple little thing. But a reminder that he cares, and is willing to go out of his way when he can to make my day a little nicer.

Yesterday was a hard parenting day. (That's the second one in a week and with a different child. We haven't had those in a while, for which I'm grateful, but two in one week was tough.) I was emotionally spent by afternoon. I knew I couldn't call Todd because he's always either in a meeting or heading to one, and I didn't have the energy to craft an email about everything that had gone on and what I was feeling. But I needed to loop him in. We exchanged a few simple texts. He was having a hard day, too, though in different ways. Then last night right before bed, he gave me the last hoarded piece of his Valentine's Day chocolate and prayed wishes for an easier day today.

It takes so little to show someone you care about them. And while neither Todd nor I are perfect at anything, even and especially that, I appreciate the small and simple ways in which he tries.

If there were any secret to a happy relationship, it's those small and simple acts of caring. Those little things that say, "Hey, I was paying attention to you enough to know that you could probably use this." 

I am fortunate enough to be told daily by my husband that he loves me. I am kissed each morning as he leaves the house and each night when he comes home, but I haven't been able to stop thinking about these two small examples of caring from the last few days. They were sweet and thoughtful and unexpected and so very appreciated. 

Guess all those hearts with "MTS + EAB" drawn all over my 9th grade algebra book cover were worth it, even if I did end up having to retake the class. ;)

Sometimes "this" is a date to Jeni's for ice cream.