I've already told this one on facebook, so sorry if it's a repeat to you, but it's a great snapshot into the psyche of 12 year old Nathaniel these days. That is to say disturbing and brilliant.
A few weeks ago at the dinner table Nathaniel jokingly said that he had a wife and 19 kids, then a few minutes later referred to his wife and 17 kids.
Me: Wait. What happened to the other two kids? You said 19 before. Now there are only 17?
Nathaniel: [Not evening missing a beat] Soylent Green baby food. Obviously.
Me: [Alternating wildly between being completely appalled and completely proud and amused by my son's wit played out with slightly guilty and uncontrollable laughter]
Nathaniel: Speaking of Soylent Green, do you think they mix the eyeballs right in, or save those for other things?
Benjamin: Like what?
Nathaniel: Salads?
Me: Actually, the sclera makes it very difficult to cut into an eyeball.
Everyone at the table: [Looks at my remark with horror (except Nathaniel, who is intrigued)]
Benjamin: WHY do you know that??
Nathaniel: Like how difficult?
Me: Well-
Todd: COULD WE PLEASE NOT DISCUSS THIS AT THE DINNER TABLE??
Me: Hm.
Caleb: [Singing] "You know we love our Soylent Green!"
Everyone at the table except Todd who was looking for a Tupperware in the kitchen so he could pack his lunch for the next day and possibly avoiding us and the current dinner conversation: "Merry Christmas from Chiron Beta Prime!"
This song is the reason my kids even know what Soylent Green is. (Spoiler alert: "It's people!")
A few weeks ago at the dinner table Nathaniel jokingly said that he had a wife and 19 kids, then a few minutes later referred to his wife and 17 kids.
Me: Wait. What happened to the other two kids? You said 19 before. Now there are only 17?
Nathaniel: [Not evening missing a beat] Soylent Green baby food. Obviously.
Me: [Alternating wildly between being completely appalled and completely proud and amused by my son's wit played out with slightly guilty and uncontrollable laughter]
Nathaniel: Speaking of Soylent Green, do you think they mix the eyeballs right in, or save those for other things?
Benjamin: Like what?
Nathaniel: Salads?
Me: Actually, the sclera makes it very difficult to cut into an eyeball.
Everyone at the table: [Looks at my remark with horror (except Nathaniel, who is intrigued)]
Benjamin: WHY do you know that??
Nathaniel: Like how difficult?
Me: Well-
Todd: COULD WE PLEASE NOT DISCUSS THIS AT THE DINNER TABLE??
Me: Hm.
Caleb: [Singing] "You know we love our Soylent Green!"
Everyone at the table except Todd who was looking for a Tupperware in the kitchen so he could pack his lunch for the next day and possibly avoiding us and the current dinner conversation: "Merry Christmas from Chiron Beta Prime!"
This song is the reason my kids even know what Soylent Green is. (Spoiler alert: "It's people!")
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