I [heart] NY

One day at the beginning of August, Todd called from work and asked what was on the calendar the week before school started, because needed to go NYC.  I said,  "Oh, no problem, I was going to take the kids to an amusement park during that time, and spend the night at a nearby hotel, so go ahead."  He said, "Um, no.  It's for all of us.  My boss's boss in NYC is having a party in the backyard of her mansion in Scarsdale and families are invited.  

Now.  Do you all remember that movie "Mona Lisa Smile"?  There is a scene in it where Marcia Gay Harden's character puts the fear of God into her Home Ec. students by presenting a scenario in which their husbands bring the boss home for dinner on the spur of the moment.  She goes on to say something to the effect of "You are being tested as well as your husband.  You may very well make or break that promotion he's up for."  This is what popped into my mind when he asked if I'd like to go.  That, and the idea of keeping our children well behaved in front of all of Todd's co-workers, yikes!!  

The thing that eventually won me over was being bribed by a hotel right at Rockefeller Center and tickets to How to Succeed In Business Without Really Trying.  Apparently, I can be bought.  ;)  I still freaked out about clothes and hair for the two weeks leading up to the trip, but it all went swimmingly in the end.

Literally!  The boss had a beautiful pool in her backyard and had hired two lifeguards to amuse [read keep track of so the parents didn't have to] the children.  So, keeping my boys well behaved wasn't so bad after all.  Also, the caterer had planned a dinner just for the children and he basically served them all.   The outdoor kitchen/pool house was probably bigger than my regular kitchen or bathroom here at home.  I don't think I said anything too awful to anyone, and actually enjoyed intelligent adult conversation where I was not mocked for staying at home with my children for over a decade, as I expected.  AND there was a flourless chocolate cake, so this gluten free lady was HAPPY!

We all survived and enjoyed it and then drove into the city, where I finally drove in NYC!!  First time in the 35 years I've been going into the city.

The next day, Todd went off to work and the kids and I ate breakfast and then headed over to the Intrepid where we met Uncle Mark and saw all sorts of cool things!

 We just happened to be at the Intrepid on the same day that there were ASTRONAUTS there from the last Atlantis shuttle mission !!  I had a vague sense that something was happening so, Lilyanna and I got in line while Mark had the boys down in the submarine.  It turned out that before they got out I had the Shuttle flight commander's autographed head shot and then got in line to meet the female Astronaut.  She was very friendly and happy to chat to all the boys while signing.  I tried to tell Lilyanna how awesome it was to meet a female astronaut, but she wasn't impressed.

 A LEGO replica of the Intrepid Aircraft Carrier.

 Mark is a total space program geek, though for some reason knows more about the Russian program than the U.S. program.  He's a little weird, that one.  ;)

No pictures, but we also went to Serendipity for huge amounts of ice cream and had pizza that was like heaven in my mouth.  (I bailed on the gluten free thing for two bites.  It was worth a rash!)

 Uncle Mark took us back to our hotel and we lounged around until Dad got back and we went out for fancy shmancy Indian food at a place called "Mint".  I recommend it.

 The next day, I told the boys I had a surprise for them.  (It wasn't this very odd sculpture in front of an office building.)

 Or going to St. Patrick's Cathedral.  We just passed those things on the way.  Here is the video of what happened when we arrived at the dummy location. [Warning: you may want to turn down the volume for Nathaniel's initial reaction.]

Not only was the store at Rockefeller Center all things Nintendo, the ground floor was also devoted almost exclusively to Pokemon.  Making it my boys' dream store and my nightmare store.  Funny how that works, isn't it?  Still they were really excited and happy, and we basically had the store to ourselves, because the Today Show had one side of the plaza blocked off for an Enrique Iglesias performance.

 And THEN we went to the American Girl Store.  We weren't going to buy anything but Lilyanna ended up with a bitty baby and matching bunny slippers for her and her baby.  She was obsessed with this video at the time we went.

After this, we hopped on a bus and headed down to the village to eat at a S'Mac, a place that does nothing but macaroni and cheese and will make any of their dishes gluten free!  Caleb and I were in heaven!  (It's right across the street from Angelica's Kitchen, the Vegan restaurant where Todd and I took his brother and wife and our two little boys 9 years ago.)

Then we headed over the river to NJ to see Todd's parents.  We took his Dad out to dinner for his birthday, had a nice day playing and chatting the next day, and then Todd and I headed into the city to see Harry Potter  Daniel Radcliffe and John Larroquette.  They both looked like they were having tons of fun onstage, which makes any show a delight to see.  Also, I LOVED the set design of this show.  It was minimal but really well executed!

 Todd waiting for our train back to NJ in the wee small hours.   Btw, the Seacaucus station is GREAT!  It's been practically empty every time I've gone through it!  Although walking to the parking lot in the middle of the night alone is a little creepy thanks to how far away it is from the station.

 And then after church the next morning, we headed back to Ohio, where we jumped immediately into before school conferences and the first day of school.

It is my fantasy to someday live in NYC.  Not forever.  Just for a year.  There's just so much to do.  I'd homeschool the kids and we'd take TONS of field trips.  Sadly, at this point, that looks like nothing more than a fantasy.  But who knows?  Things could happen!

Quick trip to NJ

Back in February the father of one of my dear friends from college passed away.  It happened to coincide with a long power loss in very cold temperatures here in Ohio, so packing up 4 kids and driving to NJ for a weekend seemed like a very reasonable thing to do.  My boys were thrilled because they were excited to see Grandma and Grandpa Smith.  (Read eat sugary cereal, wrestle with Grandpa, and watch Cartoon Network.)  Here is a fine example of that Cartoon Network thing:  

I left the boys in the capable hands of my in-laws and headed up to North Jersey for the wake and funeral.  The experience of that weekend could be a blog post all alone, but I can't put it into words in a way it deserves.  To sum up, my friend Dr. Dan is an amazing human being and clearly his father was as well.  I am a better person for knowing Dan and getting the smallest glimpse at his family.

This, however, is where Lilyanna and I spent the majority of the funeral mass.  The foyer.  At least she's consistent.  The foyer is where we spend most of sacrament meeting, too.

This is Grandpa Smith bribing Lilyanna into being his friend.  He fed her ice cream right out of the container.  Greg, the Grandfather in this case, once said to me, "Do you know why grandkids and grandparents get along so well?  They have a common enemy."  It worked, btw.  Lilyanna was his friend following the ice cream incident in a way she just wasn't before.  ;)

It was wonderful to visit with so many dear friends, both at the funeral and at a luncheon my Mother in law had for some other visiting friends, and at church as we were on our way back out of town.  But it was also nice to return home to Todd and our dear friends here

.  It's interesting to me that the way I feel about going back to NJ is the way that someday my kids will feel about coming to Ohio.  This is home to them.  They are Ohioans.  Right down to the accent.  I'm sure my father (from Wyoming) was similarly horrified by my NJ accent as I was growing up.  (Which by the way, I grew up pronouncing as "harrified".  Also, that fruit that is also a color is an "arange".  And people retire in "Flarida".  It's okay.  I don't do that anymore.  I try to comfort myself with that idea when I listen to my kids speak.)

  

Keep the Old

On our almost last day in NJ, we drove up north to have a picnic with my friend Jill and her kids, Nick and Cassie. Nick came with a full arsenal of nerf guns so fun was had by all. After we visited for a while, Jill mentioned that her younger brother, Dave, was going to stop by as well.



I haven't seen Dave since a brief hour or two my senior year of college. And even before then it had been pretty sparse. Dave and I became friends I guess around age nine or so. But not really until middle school. We lived a good hour apart, but managed to hang out a fair amount, still. It was ancient times, of course, so we wrote letters to stay in touch, every one of which I still have.



I was reading them a couple of years ago. I unfolded each carefully and when Todd asked what I was reading, I said "I'm looking at the love and friendship of a 13 year old boy."



Dave and I are about as different as two friends could be. I love being around people. He goes out of his way to avoid them. And that is just the tippy top of a whole entire iceberg of differences. When we were kids, Dave and I communicated mostly through tackling one another. Despite our differences, though, Dave was a constant sort of friend through all the changes which came through middle school, high school, and college.

In fact, I remember one very important night. His sister, Jill, and I had driven from WY to NJ in two days. We stumbled into her parents' house late in the afternoon and my only plan was to sleep until the following morning. I was particularly nervous, though, because the following day I would be seeing my boyfriend. We had dated all of my freshman year of college and spent a rotten summer apart. I wasn't sure how things were going to be. He'd pulled back a little from me that summer and I was terrified that he had decided I wasn"t worth it. I lay in bed tossing and turning in the darkness. Dave came in at some point and lay down next to me and asked what was wrong. When I told him, he said, "If he doesn't still love you, than he's an idiot and I'll knock his block off." I knew it was an overly simplistic view of the matter, but right then it was all I needed to hear. And with that I cuddled into Dave and fell asleep.

Last week, after nearly 12 years since last we saw one another, when Dave stepped out of his car, I ran across the grass, jumped up in the air, and threw my arms around him to say hello. And Dave, even though we haven't spoken in all that time, caught me up and swung me around...as if I didn't weigh 50 lbs more, have four kids, a husband, a house, and a minivan. For about 20 seconds, I was 13 years old again. And while definitely not my favorite age, he was certainly a favorite part.

On with the show, though! Picnic pictures: Mr. Zero Percent Body Fat was so cold that he borrowed my field hockey hoodie from me. Poor guy.

A motley crew indeed.

Even scarier. Though made slightly less so by Cassie's bunny ears.

Me and Dave and Cassie's bunny ears.

Mmmmm. Fooooooood. Nothing like hot dogs fresh of the grill on a chilly day.

The NJ Shore in April

What does one do on a chilly, but sunny day in NJ? Why go down the shore of course. We went to Sandy Hook, which is not my favorite, but was closest and we weren't swimming anyway since the water was so cold there was actually pain when I stuck my toes in. (The water feels dirtier there since the New York skyline is visible from the beach. I've taken the ferry often enough across the Hudson to know what's in that water. It's not something I want to swim in.) Okay, first up. The guys went for a walk down the beach and came back with a toy tug boat, a bouquet of flowers and some oranges and bananas.
Caleb stomping about. Because that's what Calebs do.

J making a sand angel. Of course.

Closer inspection of the toy tug boat revealed that three saints had been glued to it. I am SO curious about the story behind this. 100 points to the person who can explain it to me!

Caleb, chasing the sainted boat in the painfully cold water.

Right after I snapped this picture Todd, J, and my father in law started running and singing the "Chariots of Fire" theme song. They warm my frozen little heart sometimes.

Nathaniel. Not only in the freezing water. But in the freezing water with nothing but shorts on. There was screaming and crying involved upon heading back to the car. We are mean, mean parents.

Boys playing in the sand on a sunny day!

generosity

We are overrun with grain moths every spring. The nasty little buggers are gross, but an excellent excuse to clean out all the cabinets with exactness. I used to try to time the cleaning with Passover, so I could get all the chametz out of the house along with so many other people. It somehow made me feel more connected to a higher purpose than just doing it from a hatred of grain moths.

But this year we were in NJ for Passover, so that didn't happen. And we were so busy upon arriving home that I never got around to it. But the time has come. I realized today that the grain moths have become a little too much a part of our daily routine when Todd told me this story:

"Caleb had cereal first, and then decided to have some of the leftover French Toast from last night. He took a couple of bites and then said, 'I'll leave the French Toast for the grain moths.' and walked away from the table to go play."

I guess I know what priority number one for next week's project list will be.

The Mawl

In NJ, we have malls. We pronounce them "mawls". We also have NO SALES TAX ON CLOTHING!!!! I was very sad to move away from that. Granted, the thousands of dollars we save each year in property and state taxes compensate nicely for it.

Still, it bugs me to pay tax on clothes because I never had to.

After my Uncle's funeral once all of the relatives dispersed and went their seperate ways, Elysa and I decided that we needed to be true to our inner Jersey girls and headed to the mall to take advantage of the tax free clothing.

I called my friend, Heather the Awesome, to check up on my boys who she was coralling after school. HTA is from Philadelphia, so she gets the whole Jersey thing.

Our conversation:

Me: Heather, like any self-respecting Jersey girl, I am currently at the mawl.
Heather: Oh good. Did you tease your bangs so they stand five straight inches off of your forehead.
Me: Um, no. But (as I glance in the mirror) now that you mention it, my hair is way bigger today than usual.

It's good to know that my hair remembers what to do when at the mawl.

Neighborhood Weirdos

It is rather commonly known that I would spend all of my life in my comfiest PJs if I could. On Sundays I change into them as soon as we get home from church, so from 2pm on, I am in my happy pjs. In college, I used to change into them immediately upon returning to my dorm room between classes. On Tuesdays, (my blessed day of nothingness) I don't change out of them until around 11am, and that's only because I have to get Nathaniel to afternoon Kindergarten.

The night of the Super Bowl, I had to go out to the van to get something around 5pm. It was still light enough to see. And since it was a Sunday afternoon, I was already in my PJs. Also, Todd had parked the van in the street that day. I briefly considered donning a trenchcoat over my red be-penguined fleecy footsie pjs, but decided it wasn't worth the effort. And who was going to be outside during the Super Bowl anyway? Instead I slipped on my black and white polka dot rubber rain boots and headed down the driveway.

I had just reached the van when my neighbor across the street stepped out of his house wearing an enormous head lamp and carrying several light bulbs in his hands. He has a thing for flashlights and lanterns. He owns them in all shapes and sizes. Maybe it's because we're both from NJ, where a different level of quirkiness is embraced, or maybe it's becuase we were able to gaze across the street that night and recognize a common bond in one another.

We are both weirdos. We nodded at one another, not saying anything about our respective get-ups and continued on with what we were doing.

Really, everyone is a weirdo. Everyone has something that seems completely normal and rational to them but is viewed as a little absurd by everyone else.

Some people are just better about playing close to the vest with their inner weirdo.

My neighbor and me, not so much.

Last one, I swear

And this is where I spent Sunday.



I've mentioned my need to see the edge of the world now that I live in the middle of the country. Sunday afternoon, I was able to sit alone on the beach with my scriptures and plan my seminary lessons for the week. If I could plan every lesson in the warm sand like that, I think I could find it within myself to teach a third year. It was a perfect end to my weekend.

A lot of people have mentioned that they think it's unusual that I'm still so close with my college friends. They are like family for me. I don't know if it's a function of being adopted and therefore hyper aware of the fact that families can be created, or if it's just because I was at school so far from family, so they became family. Whatever the case, I love them and their families and they love me and mine. It's so nice to know that we can all still pick up the phone and start just where we left off last time we were together. I have been referring to Jeanne, Mark, Dan, and Chris Ian as "le coterie" for over a decade, because they were the people that I went to first. They've been aware and/or involved in every major part of my life since we were 18 years old. And now I have Shari, too! I have been so richly blessed with such wonderful people to love and be loved by, and I can't imagine how bleak life would be without them.

Love you guys!

Clubbing in Philly

I hated clubbing when I was in college. So when it was suggested by Chris Ian that we go clubbing in Philly after our full day of reunion stuff, I admit that I was not all that excited. It was only Chris Ian, Mark and I at that point, everyone else had left for their other plans. So, we didn't roll into Philly until just after midnight. I drove and Chris Ian was supposed to navigate. We were about 10 minutes outside of the city when I said, "Chris Ian, tell me where I need to go."

Chris Ian: Oh, just take the George Washington Bridge.

Mark: WE'RE NOT GOING TO FRIGGIN' NEW YORK, CHRIS IAN!!!!

Chris Ian: Oh, I meant the Betsy Ross Bridge.

Me: Um, Chris Ian, we're already in Pennsylvania.

Chris Ian: How 'bout the Ben Franklin?

Me: Chris Ian, we're already in PA!!! No bridges!!

Chris Ian: Oh. Well. Just follow the signs for Philly then.

Mark: Chris Ian, you are a hot tranny mess!!

When we got to the club we had the amazing luck to find immediate parking. We walked into the bar where Mark immediately recognized John. They've emailed each other a couple of times because a couple of friends are trying to set them up, but Mark had only seen his picture once. The FBI may need Mark on their side.

So we wandered the bar downstairs and then the one upstairs. Gay clubs are all sorts of fun for straight women. It's been explained to me like this: Straight women are like the little dogs that people take for walks in the park. We are conversation starters. And yes, I feel slightly objectified.

We made new friends with John and his group of friends. (When's our trip to Geneva, boys?!!) And after talking for awhile, Chris Ian and I decided to make the rounds one more time. We headed up to the club portion where we had a fabulous time!! I was so surprised at how much I enjoyed myself. I haven't danced in ages so it was fabulous to let go like that! I did learn, however, that there are creepy straight guys who go to the gay clubs and try to pick up the straight women. There was one in particular whose bumping and grinding was a little too close for comfort. Fortunately, I had a fierce Filipino man to protect me who still giggles when he thinks of the look on my face when the creepy straight guy came up behind me.



At 2 am, we collected Mark and happily headed out to our car..... which was gone. Then we looked closer at the sign. It's one of those city signs that has 8 different metal plates attached to it. Apparently, it read that it was NOT okay to park after midnight, where we had thought it was only ok to park after midnight.

Individually, we are highly intelligent people.

Collectively, we are a bunch of air-heads.

Mark ran inside to get his new friend, John who willingly came out and talked to a nice police man to find out where we needed to go, while I called to get the hours of the impound lot. Happily in Philadelphia they stay open until 3am, so we were in luck. John (we love you, John!!) drove us to a very unattractive part of town to get to the impound lot. Of course, I had to try to get me in my platform heels to the John's car parked several blocks away. This is why I don't where shoes like that EVER.

I would like to commend the city of Philadelphia on it efficient impound lot. We were able to make it out of there just after 3am and were back in Princeton by 4am. It only cost us $164.oo, which we just chalked up to a very expensive cover charge for the evening.

This was us at the impound lot:

Mark was NOT amused...and he was a little tipsy.

I look like I need to go to rehab in every picture, even though I was the designated driver for the evening. Tragic.
And this is Eeyore...I mean, Chris Ian. This is what one drink does to him. Our little hot tranny mess!!

yes, more

Chris Ian had a performance with the National Chorale at Lincoln Center, so he didn't get to us until after midnight. He promptly put on his PJs, and we all cuddled up on the bed talking until 2am. By 6:30am, we were up and decided to go swimming....because what else does one do with only 4 hours of sleep? I think being around friends makes me manic. Here are the boys getting ready. Mark ironed for everyone! I invited him to come and live with me and be my house elf, but he declined.


Dan was playing doctor that morning, and Chris Ian is on a one man mission to bring back the bow-tie! The former roomies are cute as ever:


Anyway, then we headed to our alma mater for a choral rehearsal and luncheon and concert. The day was gray and rainy, but it was lots of fun to see people again. Our group significantly brought down the average age of the group, who was mostly made up of the class of 1958 with a few strays from the 60s and 70s. My new friend from the day is named Hazel and has a 45 year old son. Good times.

Here are my boys and Scott who we also convinced to come sing with us that day. We arrived at rehearsal a few minutes late and when we walked in, he was the only one with non-gray hair. He was understandably relieved at our presence.
Isn't our music hall so beautiful? I love it. This is where I performed every on-campus concert for choir, chorale, orchestra, and my senior recital through my college career.


And here is a group shot. We are joined by Mr. Robert Guarino, voice teacher and choir director when we were in school and still as "Richard Gere hot" as ever, and our dear friend Jeanne K. and her BEAUTIFUL son Christofer. That kid is seriously gorgeous and so well behaved!

Here is the ever popular shot of Chris Ian with our creepy school mascot. It all started one night about 12 years ago in the student center when I said, "What is our mascot, anyway?" and Chris Ian responded "We're the Lions. You know? Roar?" and did this exact pose. We repeat it as often as possible.


Here's Dr. Gorgeous! I mean Dan chillin' in the student center, which is the only building they haven't totally changed in the last 10 years.



Following our performance and earfuls of gossip from Mr. Guarino, we headed out to dinner and then to the infamous Halo Farms in Trenton. It's fairly gross, but it's dang cheap, so there were always ice cream runs to it in college. Usually followed by runs of another sort. Little boys enjoying their ice cream while waiting for me to unlock the door. (There were many times this weekend that I felt as though I had merely traded three little boys at home, for these three big boys in NJ.)

Aren't they so cute?!